Free life lesson

Driving the wife to work this morning, some jackass on Marietta Street decided that it would be better for him – rather than waiting 30 seconds for the cars in front of him to turn left – to jump out into the right-hand lane directly in front of me, my wife, Cletus the fetus and my Acura TL. Thanks to my cat-like reflexes, superb driving skills and the TL”s responsiveness, what was almost a fairly significant crash turned into some mild scraping of car bodies – my beautiful TL”s front left against jackass” shitty Nissan Sentra”s right rear:

OK, really mild scraping. But it”s damage to my car and danger to my family caused by reckless behavior. So these free life lessons are in play for the jackass at fault:

- If you”re going to cut into the path of an oncoming car, it”s probably wise to wait for a car that”s about as shitty as yours, not new and much nicer.

- When you recklessly cause property damage and put us in danger because you”re too stupid to stay out of turn lanes and too impatient to wait it out, I”m not going to “settle it among ourselves”, no matter how insignificant you think the damage is.

- The police agree with me. That”s what that citation and court date mean.

- You are never going to get anywhere with my wife – especially in her current condition – by suggesting that she convince me to realize “it”s just scrapes” and forget about it.

- You could have invested 30 seconds at that light to save a moving violation, fine, day in court and higher insurance rates when you saw there was a car coming in the right lane.

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