Archive for May, 2004

This week’s Pivik

Finals are going on down at LSU, and so The Reveille is done for the semester. Therefore, no Jessica Pivik column. In fact, we may have seen the last of “On Top”. But no worries. I figured Jessica would be busy with finals this week, so I wrote her column for her. On Top With [...]

I hear the FBI is now hot on the tail of Tommy Vercetti

I don”t know if this story is true, but if it is, it”s damn hilarious. The Google TerrroristIt was the lead item on the government”s daily threat matrix one day last April. Don Emilio Fulci described by an FBI tipster as a reclusive but evil millionaire, had formed a terrorist group that was planning chemical [...]

Thank you for calling the European-American Unity and Rights Organization, Whitey speaking

Everybody”s favorite ex-Klansman, almost-governor and almost-senator of Louisiana, David Duke, is fulfilling his halfway-house “work” requirement by answering the phones at the European-American Unity and Rights Organization, an organization he founded which owns the charming URL of www.whitecivilrights.com. Duke”s halfway-house stint is the last part of a federal sentence he”s serving for fraud. So if [...]

A girl by any other name …

I”m a big fan of useless statistics. As Clifford Worley said, I find that shit fascinating. So when the Social Security Administration comes out with its annual list of top baby names, I like to spend a little time poking around their database. Since 1990 (they must have upgraded to 486 CPUs that year), they”ve [...]

Hog-Dog Update

Louisiana”s effort to outlaw violent “hog-dogging” events in the state is cruising to approval. Meanwhile, a bill to outlaw cockfighting can”t even get through committee. Hog-dogging, in case you missed my earlier post, is a “sport” in which mean-ass dogs are turned loose in a competition to corner (in “legitimate” hog-dog events) or kill (in [...]

Weekly Jessica Pivik update

Sorry, but what she wrote this week is so utterly lacking in her normal brand of mindless “shocking” sex talk, Sex and the City ripoffs, Googled quotes or forced references to actual useful information, it”s not worth me noting. Not that it was any good, mind you. But she must have been distracted by finals [...]

The best eulogy ever

At the memorial service for NFL player turned war hero Pat Tillman, his little brother gave an amazingly frank eulogy: Tillman”s youngest brother, Rich, wore a rumpled white T-shirt, no jacket, no tie, no collar, and immediately swore into the microphone. He hadn”t written anything, he said, and with the starkest honesty, he asked mourners [...]

Shake, rattle and roll

Tonight, the wife and I watched the comically-horrible 10.5, NBC”s earthquake mini-mini series. Thanks to TiFaux, the 4-hour event cost us only 2.94 hours of our lives. My words will fall well short of explaining just how awful this thing was. From the opening scene of a bike rider outracing a quake (and the falling [...]

The ultimate LSU collectible

I was searching Froogle last night for LSU gear (there”s no offseason for Tiger stuff), and among the strange assortment of products that Google”s ultra-powerful shopping engine turned up was this: Nifty, huh? At first glance, it looks like it might be some kind of alcohol-delivery system. That would be in keeping with LSU tradition, [...]

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