Cap’n Ken’s Homespun Wisdom

Nike is set to unveil the next worst moment in LSU football history today. And though they can’t top Les Miles’ performance in the last minute of the Ole Miss game, they come sort of close.

I give you the LSU Nike Pro Combat uniform in all its abominable glory:

LSU's Nike Pro Combat uniform

So let’s break this ugly mother down.

Nike’s “theme” for the uniform is “Cochon de Lait” because it’s being worn for the Arkansas game. The concept is described on Nike’s Pro Combat site thusly:

The Bayou Bengals are planning an old-fashioned pig roast, complete with an updated dress code inspired by the legendary LSU teams of the 1940s.

As I pointed out before, of course, there wasn’t anything particularly legendary about LSU football in the 1940s. No national titles, no SEC titles, one bowl win, .600 winning percentage. So in the press release that goes out today, Nike has changed the notion of this “tribute” somewhat:

The uniform draws inspiration from LSU teams of the 1940s, led by legendary Tigers quarterback Y.A. Tittle. A dark gold helmet is a similar tone to the look worn by the Tigers during Tittle’s era. The color also represents the Golden Boot that LSU will play for on November 28, as it does annually.

So now the teams weren’t legendary, just Y.A. Tittle. At least they seem to understand history a little better now.

OK, so a top to bottom examination of this monstrosity.

The helmet:

Hey, hold on a second. Something’s a little off between the helmet shown in the full uniform shot and the one in the helmet detail.

Did LSU’s administration grow a spine? The helmet shown in the detail looks pretty familiar, and it’s definitely not the Washington shade of gold. Interesting. We’ll have to see what’s officially rolled out today, I guess.

But the concept is this tribute to the storied years of the 1940s … I mean Y.A. Tittle. That gold (edit: the “old gold”, not the current gold), of course, is closer to the gold worn by the legendary teams of the 1940s … I mean Y.A. Tittle. Mr. Tittle, of course, didn’t have the current LSU helmet logo on his helmet; that didn’t come along until 1977. If what we see is the old gold helmet with no logo (which seems like what’s in the full-uniform shot), then that’s probably Nike’s original concept. If we see the helmet that’s the current LSU color (or close to it) and logo, I guess that means LSU balked at the wholesale change. And I guess that’s a good thing, but the results would be even uglier than the full Nike concept.

If they are going to bill this as a tribute to the storied 1940s Tigers … I mean Y.A. Tittle (as opposed to, say, the 1958 National Championship team), at least be true to the history. This just comes off as a hideous compromise of Nike and LSU’s ideas.

UPDATE: Photos are in from the “pep rally” on campus today unveiling these things. The helmet is I guess the “old gold” (looks a little different in natural light?). Hey, I only posted what Nike provided, and they still show the yellower version in their media material.

The jersey:

Below the helmet, there’s really nothing at all that would identify this getup as an LSU uniform. Those aren’t our shades of purple and gold. We don’t outline our numbers like this. Our stripes stand proudly on our shoulders, not crammed in to the tiny remnants of sleeves modern jerseys have. And our stripes are gold in the middle with purple borders, not the other way around.

Again, they’re selling this as a tribute to the jersey Y.A. Tittle wore. Yeah, OK. It’s true that in the 1940s we had stripes on our sleeves instead of our shoulders. But back then, they actually had sleeves. With no proper sleeves to speak of, the notion of this as a “tribute” falls apart. And, again, if they had gone with a “tribute” to the 1958 team, we’d not only still have our proper colors, but we’d have stripes on the shoulders. But that would get in the way of the “high tenacity yarn” on the shoulders that Nike sells as a major feature of this uniform. Can’t get in the way of Nike marketing, you know.

The pants:

White pants. Enough said there. Never should happen with LSU. And, of course, Nike feels the need to stylize the stripes. And the “L” on the leg? I’ve never seen just an “L” linked to LSU except for in Everybody’s All American, when LSU officials didn’t want our actual name associated with a dirty movie. edit: comments here and elsewhere about the use of “L” with LSU apart from the uniforms specifically have changed my mind. I’m OK with the “L”, but still think LSU was stupid for not letting Everybody’s All American call its team “LSU”.

Shoes:

If Nike is honoring Y.A. Tittle with this uniform, they must be honoring M.C. Hammer with these shoes. Just … wow. These don’t look like shoes that would actually, you know, perform well on the field. But I suppose Nike does know what they are doing there. Before they became a fashion house, they used to make shoes.

The getup also includes gloves with fancy designs, but those aren’t worth the bandwidth. The gloves do carry the sole appearance of LSU’s stupid “eye of the tiger” logo, and the only good news about this hideous uniform is that the “eye” doesn’t seem to appear elsewhere.

If you haven’t guessed, I’m really not happy that LSU is turning over its season finale this weekend to Nike for an infomercial. You can count on a segment in the broadcast Saturday night where the sideline reporter talks about the technology of the uniform, how it’s lightweight, how modern players are more like track stars, etc. It’s a marketing gimmick, not a “tribute”. And shame on LSU for participating.

It should also be noted that LSU appears to be the program that’s allowed Nike to screw with its identity the most for this infomercial series. The historically-inaccurate helmet logo (and color?) is really the only thing that would identify these players as being an LSU team. I don’t think any of the other 10 teams (Clemson apparently is a part of this, but they aren’t on the promo site) had their colors changed, and I know none of them allowed both a color change and radical change in uniform design.

It’s sad. You’d think a head coach that’s been with the program for just under five years, an athletic director that’s been with the program for 17 months and a chancellor that’s been with the program for 15 months would be better guardians of LSU’s identity. Actually, I guess you wouldn’t think that.

If Les Miles could change the outcome of one play in LSU’s loss to Ole Miss, it might be his Tigers’ onside kick in the final minute. If Dexter McCluster grabs the ball instead of jumping away from it, Leslie would only be facing questions about his team’s performance from late in the second quarter to late in the fourth. Instead, he’s facing very real and justified questions about his competence and even his character.

Without the kick recovery, LSU would not have stood at the Ole Miss 32-yard line (after an excellent screen pass to and run by Brandon LaFell), within range of Josh Jasper with 56 seconds and two timeouts remaining.

Without the kick recovery, Miles and Gary Crowton would not have been able to call the first-down pass play that put LSU (No. 105 nationally in sacks allowed) in a position to be nearly sacked by Ole Miss (No. 25 nationally in sacks). Nor would Miles and Crowton have been able to call another pass play on second down, which did result in a sack, taking the team out of field goal range and forcing the use of its second timeout.

Without the kick recovery, Miles and Crowton would not have been able to put their team in a third and 19 situation with 32 seconds and one timeout left. Nor would Miles and Crowton have been able to call a slow-developing swing pass (to Stevan Ridley, the running back Miles and Crowton weren’t comfortable handing the ball off to) that lost another seven yards and six seconds.

Without the kick recovery, Miles could not have failed to call a timeout (or instruct his players during the previous timeout to do so) for 16 seconds after the third-down play ended, leaving only nine seconds remaining for LSU’s fourth-and-26 play.

Without the kick recovery, we would not know that Miles and his staff were completely unprepared for any outcome of a long pass other than a touchdown, incompletion or interception.

And, most significantly, without the kick recover we would not have seen Miles flat-out lie about his actions following the Hail Mary completion:

There is no other way to put it. Miles lied when he said he was not calling for a spike after the long completion. He lied, and he shifted blame to Jordan Jefferson. The game footage also clearly shows LaFell motioning for a spike after looking to the sideline. Jefferson looks confused but also seems to believe he’s being told to spike it. And he was. Those who blame Jefferson for any of this are very much misguided. He was given no plan, just orders from the sideline after the catch. There was no time to take a snap, anyway.
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Update: There is a school of thought that Miles was signaling that Toliver was down after an Ole Miss player came up with the ball. That is a plausible explanation, but there are a couple of problems with that analysis. First, watching the YouTube clip in sync with the CBS telecast, you can see that Miles is still making that motion after the referee has indicated LSU possession. Second, LaFell clearly got the “spike” signal from the sideline and D.J. McCarthy is seen doing it as they get to the line. And finally, the first shot of Miles shows him going back to who I think is special teams coordinator Joe Robinson, saying something and making a kicking motion as the offense lines up for the spike. Clearly he wouldn’t think they would be able to get the kick team out before a spike play is run.
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Miles lied about the spike call, and I strongly suspect he’s lying about trying to call a timeout when the previous play ended. Of the timeout situation, Miles said:

“I heard the timeouts being called verbally and I’m repeating it but not getting it to the officials apparently,” Miles said.

Only players and the head coach can call timeouts. So I guess Miles is saying his coaches were telling him to call a timeout; he was calling for a timeout … but the officials didn’t hear him?

If you recall from my award-eligible 2007 video “I’m The Head Coach”, Miles is both not shy about making sure the refs know he’s calling timeouts (even when he shouldn’t) and sometimes clueless about the game situation:

I would really love to see video of what was going on with Miles and the coaches after the third-down play. It’s inexcusable that his players were not instructed during the previous timeout to call another one if the play ends inbounds. It’s unbelievable that Miles would have been unsuccessfully asking for a timeout for 16 seconds. He seems to be claiming that he’s calling for a timeout, but not in a way where the officials can hear it. I can’t believe that’s what happened.

So, because of the kick recovery, we’re left with an ugly reality. Les Miles and his staff are incompetent when it comes to basic game management. Any sort of advanced game strategy (for instance, not trying two pass plays when you’re in range of a winning field goal, your team gives up a ton of sacks and you’re facing a team that gets a lot of sacks) seems way too much to ask from this group.

I’m not surprised by Miles’ incompetence. I’ve been pointing it out since his first game as LSU’s coach and have never been swayed from my opinion that he seems like kind of a dumb guy. But I’m surprised and more than a little concerned that he seems willing to lie about what takes place during his demonstrations of incompetence. That’s a really big deal – gets to a man’s character.

The “fire Les Miles” calls seem to have really come out in force after this debacle. I don’t think he should be fired because of his decisions in the last minute of yesterday’s game. I think it’s fair to question the direction of the program at the end of the season – and next week’s game against Arkansas will be important in that regard. And I think LSU has seen its best days under Les Miles. Because he Forest Gumped his way into a National Championship two years ago, he’s got a lot of padding to absorb questions about his current performance. And I don’t know that I would fire him this year if we lose to Arkansas, lose a bowl game and end up 8-5 again. Even if it’s the right call, it would still seem very reactionary. Unless LSU had a hugely solid guy in mind to succeed him, it probably isn’t the right time.

However, what I think is absolutely in order is an internal investigation of Miles’ statements and documented actions that seem to indicate he’s lying about what went down at the end of the game. Miles’ contract has a “Standards” clause that states the following:

COACH shall perform his duties and personally comport himself at all times in a manner consistent with good sportsmanship and in accordance with the high moral, ethical and academic standards of the Athletic Department and the UNIVERSITY.

And violation of those Standards are cause for termination. I would assume lying about your actions on the job would be a violation of the high moral and ethical standards of the Athletic Department and LSU. I’m not saying Miles should absolutely be fired if it’s determined that he lied about what happened in the Ole Miss game, but I think there’s clearly cause for the university to look into his statements and conflicting evidence of what happened. And if it’s determined that he lied, at least a suspension would be in order.

I’ll be interested to see how all this plays out. I don’t think it can just go away. Miles, I’m sure, will want everybody to focus on the super-awesome new uniforms Nike is putting his team in for the Arkansas game and “finishing strong”. But there’s a really dark cloud over Miles right now.

If only McCluster didn’t jump away from that ball.